Warning: Reading this post and the links herin may take 2 hours

I have a new reason to live. So, last night we had a charming surprize visitor--Matt from TX. He interveiwed at LECOM, and we sure hope that he moves here, because I would love to be friends with their family. They seem absolutely awesome. I looked at their blog, and besides adorable pictures of their children and steller eyebrows on his wife, I saw a link to Cake Wrecks. I laughed so hard I got a headache. Seriously. I woke up this morning and couldn't stop laughing about this post in particular. BTW, read with discretion--I do NOT approve of all of the humor here, but it's all pretty harmless.

My Love Affair with Jazz

A-a-a-awhhhh. . . jazz. Forget whatever I said in my profile. . . there is no music but jazz. The honeyed tones accompanied by solos on romantic instruments, the excitement you can feel building in your toes all the way out to your arms. It gives me tingles in all the right places--more than tingles, actually, the fervor of it crawls all over my body. It's like all of those cliche occurences--maybe a first kiss--(although I never had a 1st kiss that wasn't staged--maybe like the 20th kiss?)--the way you feel when the man you love is down on his knee, and you know this time it's the real thing--no, I know, the way you feel reading Twilight. This is the music I can sing my heart out to. . . the stuff where I absolutely must get up and dance! Throw my arms up in the air! Puckishly run my fingers through my hair, and ignore the strange looks from the cat. Honestly, how can you not seductively sway your shoulders at least a little to "Girl from Ipanema?" "Everything" by Michael Buble is my favorite. There aren't many songs that make me quiver and shriek (much to the amusement of Joanna) everytime I hear them, but WOW! that song is exciting. ("Hey Ya" by Outkast does too, for some odd. Go figure.) That man is aptly named. "Buble" That's just what happens in my soul when I hear him sing. It "Buble-s." (not "bubbles," "Buble-s"--and don't forget the capital "B"). "Sway" makes me want to don a red sequined dress with a form-fitting skirt--slit to my knee on one side, long sleeves, thick red lipstick, fake eyelashes, and a large white flower in my hair. Mmmmm. . . and black stillettos. And of course I'm being twirled and dipped by my handsome husband--wearing an open white dress shirt and a black fedora too low over his eyes. . . and suspenders. Suspenders are hot. Can you see it? I want to go dancing!

Mine, Me, Myself, and I

So a few weeks ago in church, this amazing sister (Julia Reynolds) made a really good point--and I've been thinking about it ever since. I forget what the question was (Paul Dickenson asks some good ones), but she answered by saying that a lot of advertising is all about how having the product will give you power over other people. . . like by making your friends jealous, your kids happy, the opposite sex not be able to resist you. . . that sort of thing. Why do I have to be so power hungry? I would totally buy laundry detergent that makes people flock toward me so they could sniff my clothing--hey, I'd settle for one that made my husband do that.
I wish I were a more charitable person. I get so greedy--wanting the perfect house, the perfect image, the perfect kids, the perfect husband ("perfect" meaning having all these things utterly under my control). And why do I want these things? To influence people to like me? Probably. To get my way? Quite likely. To be happy? You bet. It just doesn't work that way.
Well, I was thinking about this when I went down with my friend, Danielle Bruening, to see Sister Julie B. Beck in Pittsburg. As the opening song started, I wrote down some questions I wanted answered (as is my habit). When Sister Beck opened up the meeting for questions I think my jaw just about hit my knees! I couldn't ask her any of my questions--they were all so shallow. I can sum them up for you here--"How can I make myself and everyone around me be perfect?" ("perfect" of course, meaning they would conform exactly to my standards). I've actually been super stressed about it. I want to be perfect and help my family be perfect, and not necessarily in some evilly concocted way. Even though I didn't ask her my question--she answered it directly. I took down this quote. "We don't get the dream here; we get the experience." This world wasn't meant to be like the Celestial Kingdom. I get it now--at least more than I did before. I love that quote. . . maybe I can put it on a super-cute plaque in my living room, and when I invite company over, they can say. . . awww, what a nice thought--Ali Mae is super cool. . . and then, they will be in my power! Mwah-ha ha ha! (Of course that means actually having enough control over my life that I'd have enough time to make such a thing; so I'm pretty sure that plaque will never happen).

Why I love Robert (In no particular order)

He looks super hot in his karate pants--even if he kind of looks silly using an exercize ball.

He takes Joanna to the beach. AND cleans her up afterward.

He says things like "rationalizing isn't THAT bad."

He does my bidding when it comes to fixing up the house. (Thanks for the new light and window shade, sweetums.)

He listens to my ramblings about how cool my friends are and he pays attention when I talk to him about the impressions I get when I go to church things. (Julie B. Beck in Pittsburg was great! I'm so glad I was able to go with my friend, Danielle, and then meet up with the other sisters.)

He practically cooks (good food!) the entire weekend.

He studies hard, but every so often, he makes me and the kids feel so comfortable before and after, that I hardly notice how much time he's taking to read his books.

He shows me up at a lot of things, actually, but that's okay, I'm glad I married up!

Glum, Glum (aka, don't read if you are susceptible to depression)

Okay, lately I've been in some sort of deep funk... I can't seem to do anything (at least not well), or turn my thoughts into more productive ones. Berate, Berate, Berate. (But Hey, at least I'm not interrupting people as much :D). So, I'm way behind on posting. I was going to sit down and throw up a few scrapbook pages, maybe talk about how awesome the plans I have to decorate my house are, ummm... I'm sure there was something else..., but really I don't feel like posting much right now. So here are a few pictures--you can make of them what you will. I might go take a nap.
Robert made good bread--4 loaves
Seth came to visit and interview at LECOM. Keep your fingers crossed.
My fairy prince. Apparently, when he sleeps, his wings come out. (*picture not staged--notice the princess blanket and dragon)
Our new floor.
Asbury park. They have cool puppets.

Are we limiting ourselves, or just honing in?

BYU--"The world is our campus"
LECOM--"The community is our campus"

Just thought I'd ask. Rather, Robert asked, and I thought I'd post it. (He accused me of plagiarism! So, I thought I better mention that.)

BTW, I may practically be an editor, but I'm too lazy to see how to actually spell the word "honing" for my blog, or how to make a real em dash on here. All other posts are also not edited :).

One of my favorite people

This is my sister Sandi. She's absolutely awesome. (If not a little nuts). My family just moved to Tooele, and she's having a hard time adjusting there. I don't blame her. It's hard to leave a place as great as Orem/Provo. And the YW group she had to leave is the best I ever attended (of course, it was one of the only ones that included more than just my sisters and me on a regular basis :P). We never really get along (she's pretty bossy for a youngest sister, and it doesn't help that we share a birthday ;D), but when we do... ahhh... good times. I think I miss her the most because of that. Here's to you Sandi.

Fnow! (not a typo, that's how she says it)

Sorry this is so long... Believe it or not, I cut a lot of cute stuff out of it. If you make it to the end, my favorite part is where I tell her she can play in the snow if she can find some and she smiles a little. My hope is that at least the grandmas will watch it... we'll see. I think the end is pretty funny. Joanna was having a bad day. She was incredibly whiny that day (I guess I shouldn't think that's cute, but it is) asking for her "pink coat," not the purple one that we bought last spring. I should've known what was up. As soon as I let her put it on, she wanted snow! It's barely September!! It was too funny, so before I answered her, I took off her coat, grabbed the camera and started over--this is what followed.

I'd be a much better parent if I didn't have kids.

Some of the fateful things I have said this week.
1) Ok, you can have the crayons, so long as you don't color with them.
2) What do you mean you don't want a popsicle? (trying to force a "pockle" on Nana when she wanted a pickle).
3) The closest you're getting to playing in the snow is me putting you in a cold bath. (See following post).
4) To Robert: When do you think we'll be ready for another baby?

Turn that frown upside-down and smile all the while

You know those days where you are so mad and frustrated that you just want to stay mad and frustrated? (This is basically what I think Hell is like). So, I've been reading this book, "DON'T SWEAT THE SMALL STUFF" pretty much because I was bored one day and it was the most interesting thing in our house (at least besides "THE FAR SIDE GALLERY" which I have already read so many times it stopped being funny--if that's possible). Besides, I've always wanted to read it, so I dug in. It's pretty good. I realized I'm a petty and annoying person :D. But the book is helping. I think I've been doing better. At least I know what I'm doing wrong. . . we'll see how it goes. My goal this week from the book is--Don't interrupt people. I'm on the path to perfection! Errrr. . . at least mortal happiness. (We'll see how long this lasts. . .)

Erie Zoo

Loved the zoo. The Keiths were awesome to take us. We had tons of fun. I think Joanna wouldn't have had half as much fun if Gracie wasn't there. There's a pic of them by the otter tank. We also took some pictures by the polar bear (Joanna's birth animal) and the giraffes (Enoch's birth animal).
I think we will get a zoo pass for next year!